


hi, i'm with public relations

by lastbattlecry



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Humor, Jedi Council - Freeform, Jedi Order positive, Jedi Younglings (Star Wars), Jedi need better PR, Kinda, Mace Windu Apprecation, Mace Windu is So Done, PR Departments, Public Relations, Twitter Fic, no beta we die like meh, who are adorable
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:21:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27919666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lastbattlecry/pseuds/lastbattlecry
Summary: Bail Organa decides that the Jedi need help to better their public image.Enter one Hapi G'Luki, Public Relations.Chaos ensues.
Comments: 96
Kudos: 229





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TessaDoesThings](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TessaDoesThings/gifts).



> Blame the discord

“...I’m sorry?”   
  
The nearly fluorescent pink twi’lek beamed at Mace, and the korun could already feel a shatterpoint looming.

“Public Relations! I was assigned by Senator Bail Organa to assist you in helping the Jedi, and this Council, with helping the public to see that you are all people too!”

“But we are people…?” Came the confused question from Mace’s right, and he could only pinch the bridge of his nose as a migraine bloomed full force.

“Of course you are!” Was the bubbly reply. “But you all are just so….  _ mysterious _ all the time that people sometimes forget that. Which is what I’m here for!”

Mace could  _ feel _ the genuine happiness and desire to help literally spilling out of the twi’lek, who’s name he  _ still _ can’t remember, and just decided to give in to the inevitable.

“Teach us how, you will?” Yoda asked, and the sheer  _ glee _ coming off the troll was enough for Mace to reach into the side of his chair and pull out the flask he keeps there for  _ special occasions _ .

“I’m not doing the paperwork,” he announced, grimacing as he swallowed the horrible bootleg booze he confiscated from a pair of senior padawans. It wasn’t half bad. “I did the paperwork last time,  _ someone else _ is doing it this time.”

A quick series of silent  _ not it’s _ went around the room, with Kit Fisto making a face as he wasn’t quite quick enough to outdraw Plo, who’s glee was nearly as strong as Yoda’s.

Mace  _ refused _ to do the paperwork.

“Excellent! Now, my name, for those of you who don’t know, is Hapi G’Luki,” the twi’lek, apparently named  _ Hapi _ (Mace took another swallow and stoically ignored the disapproval coming from Oppo), “and I’m going to being helping the Jedi as a whole with bettering their public image! Oh, I’m so excited!”

Mace sat back in his chair, head throbbing, and completely surrendered, draining the rest of his flask and reaching for the other with a grimness more suited for an execution.

It was going to be one of  _ those _ days.

* * *

**abs@fishstick**

Hello, holonet! I am Kit Fisto, Jedi Master and Member of the High Council here on Coruscant.

**angy face@purplemf**

Who did this.

**serene@babymf**

I have no idea, but I’m loving it.

**somft@dadvibes**

Ah. Should I not have let the padawans create our ‘handles’?

**bringsexyback@redheads**

really? REALLY

**badass@momvibes**

I quite like this, actually.

**highaskite@truhue**

am i tripping

**bringsexyback@redheads**

considering your handle, i’m going to say yes

**happy@JOPRDepartment**

Ok! That was a good first session! Good job everyone!

**littelgreen@troll**

banging, it was

**arms@sleevless**

oh my gods


	2. The Temple Tour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said that Anakin would be in this one, but i couldn't work him in! Maybe next time!

“Okay! So, today is the day of the Temple Tour, the film crew will be here soon, are there any last minute instructions you have for us Master Windu?” Miss G’Luki asked in a voice way too chipper for this early in the morning.

Mace stared at her, wearing nothing but his sleep pants and a robe thrown on quickly over top. “....what.”

Dark brown eyes crinkled at the corners and Miss G’Luki smiled with all her teeth, the sharp points gleaming in the dim lights. “The Temple Tour, it’s been on the schedule for months now!”

Mace blinked at the twi’lek, who was almost the same height as him, and wanted to slam his head into the wall.  _ Kit Fisto _ , he thought with some less than Jedi feelings,  _ why are you like this. _

“What time,” he sighed, already resigned to giving up his day to make sure that his idiot people don’t embarrass themselves too badly for the galaxy to see.

“They’re already here!”

Mace just turned around and shut the door in G’Luki’s face, ignoring the ringing laughter coming from across the hall where Plo lived.

He wasn’t drunk enough for this.

  
  
  


Mace got his revenge though. No matter how much it was  _ un-Jedi-like _ to seek revenge.

Justice.

Yes, Mace got his  _ justice _ later that day.

* * *

  
  


“And where’s this, Master Jedi?”

Dooku’s eye twitched in aggravation, and he caught Plo Koon’s eye.  _ How _ he got roped into this-this  _ ridiculous _ farce was something that irked him mightily, and the cheerful glee Koon radiated into the Force around them only served to irritate him further.

“ _ This _ ,” Dooku said as evenly as he could, back straight and hands behind him, “is the Halls of Remembrance, filled with stories and legends of our past from all over the galaxy.”

A toydarian working with the camera droid flapped harder and panned for a wide angle shot, catching the stained glass windows and crumbling statues, masks and cloaks and rusted sabers, a helm of beskar resting next to an empty lightsaber display on a satin cloth.

“Oh, that’s  _ fascinating _ ! Is it just Jedi history, or is it the Republic's history as well?” The interviewer, a young zabrak, asked eagerly, writing quickly on her pad.

“No, it is less of a collective history as it is our  _ memory _ ,” Dooku corrected, starting a slow walk through the cavernous hall. “Jedi have been a part of the galaxy for longer than most realize, and some believe that we have even predated the Old Republic.”

“ _ Fascinating _ ,” the girl repeats scribbling quickly. Then she lifted her blue eyes to meet his. “And you say that this is from all over the galaxy, but the Jedi are based on Coruscant, and have been for over a  _ thousand _ years. So is this, uh,  _ Hall _ , filled with various artefacts from past missions?”

Dooku tilted his head as he led them through a side hall, smaller than the main one, that branched out into other smaller alcoves. “The main Temple is on Coruscant, as is the High Council, but this is not the only conclave we have.”

“ _ Really? _ ” Asked one of the techs, who quailed when Dooku turned and gave him a look for interrupting.

“There are many different Temples,” Koon cut in, smoothly taking control before Dooku could scare the poor boy too much. “And many different faiths and beliefs. Not all call themselves  _ Jedi _ as we do, and they do not have to. The Force is in all things, and cannot be owned by any one being.”

The interviewer opened her mouth, but was cut off as a clan of younglings came tumbling out of a doorway like tooka kittens, giggling and playing with each other. Dooku felt himself soften just a little at the carefree  _ lighthappycontent _ they brought with them.

An audible coo left most of the vid crew, and it took effort to keep from scoffing.

“Ah, Hawkbat Clan!” Koon said with delight, stepping forward. “Learning about your bedtime stories, hmm?”

Giggling filled the air as the younglings tried to straighten out, shoving each other and tugging on their tunics. “Yes, Master Plo.”

Even a Force Null could tell the kel dor was smiling, and he knelt in front of the smallest youngling, a little togruta girl who shyly hid her face in her lek.

“And where is your minder, Kirda?” Koon asked gently, tucking a knuckle beneath  _ Kirda’s _ chin. Giggles broke out between the younglings again, and they looked at each other with mischief written all over their faces.

Kirda gave Koon such a look of wide eyed innocence that Dooku  _ knew _ that they created chaos somewhere deeper in the Halls for them to be unaccompanied. 

He sighed, and saw the way the camera droid was slowly zooming in on the, admittedly, adorable scene happening. They can’t risk the younglings being alone in the Halls, they could get hurt. “Come along then, you can stay with us while we finish this section of our tour.”

Dooku got some nervous looks, but the younglings quickly overcame their hesitation and dragged them all around the Halls, chattering about which stories they know and sharing their favorites with the crew, who seemed to be completely enthralled with them.

“It seems that we are no longer needed,” Koon murmured low, stepping up so he was level with Dooku.

He gave the Master a look from the corner of his eye, and sniffed haughtily. “If they are going to speak of our history, they should at least get it  _ right _ .”

Koon laughed, clapping Dooku on the shoulder. “Ah, my friend, they are children. Let them enjoy themselves.”

There wasn’t much he could say to that, now was there.

  
  


The vid got over eight hundred  _ billion _ views, and more every day.

* * *

  
  


**angy face@purplemf**

I would like to thank the vid crew from @docugalactic for being so kind and courteous to the Hawkbat clan, we appreciate your patience, and forgiveness for the… incident with the M’Jura display.

**guradel@docugalactic**

It was our genuine pleasure, Master Windu! We got a lot of great footage, and the younglings were absolutely adorable! Please, call on us again if you ever have need of a vid crew!

**arms@sleevless**

so if i wanted to film some less than savory acts i should hit you up is what i’m hearing ;)

**bringsexyback@redheads**

Quinlan VOS

**startwileking@p!nkless**

@sleevless can hit ME up at any time! Call me!

**happy@JOPRDepartment**

I’m so glad it went well! Thank you for everyone that participated, and Hawkbat Clan sends their sincere apologies, and homemade cookies, to the crew at @docugalactic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> angy face@purplemf - Mace Windu  
> guradel@docugalactic - the zabrak interviewer  
> arms@sleevless - Quinlan Vos  
> bringsexyback@redheads - Obi-wan Kenobi  
> startwileking@p!inkless - a random on the HoloNet  
> happy@JOPRDepartment - Hapi G'Luki
> 
> maybe hit up my tumblr??? [here](https://thelastbattlecry.tumblr.com/post/636783578395623424/hi-im-with-public-relations-chapter-1)

**Author's Note:**

> abs@fishstick - Kit Fisto  
> angy face@purplemf - Mace Windu  
> serene@babymf - Depa Billiba  
> somft@dadvibes - Plo Koon  
> bringsexyback@redheads - Obi-Wan Kenobi  
> highaskite@turhue - a random on the HoloNet  
> badass@momvibes - Shaak Ti  
> happy@JOPRDepartment - Hapi G'Luki (OC)  
> littelgreen@troll - Yoda  
> arms@sleevless - Quinlan Vos


End file.
